Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop (2011)
VERDICT:
9/10 Cone Zones
Coco unleashed in all his bearded glory.
That’s right, my babies, definitely one of the best I’ve seen this year and better than a whole lot of garbage that’s out there right now. Freakin’ hilarious, incredibly honest, and it’s about damn time The Ginja Ninja got his chance to speak out. What an awesome guy.
So hit the jump for the full review, gang. This one’s a keeper.
http://blog.moviefone.com/2011/06/21/conan-obrien-cant-stop-review-coco-unleashed-in-all-his-bea/
And the flat-out weirdest movie ever made is…
ERASERHEAD!
Still haven’t seen this, I don’t know what’s taking me, but from what I’ve heard it sounds like a deserving winner. Seems like this poll belonged to David Lynch, and as someone who actually paid to see all three hours of Inland Empire in theaters, that ain’t much of a surprise.
Good voting, folks. Y’all are some weirdos.
RESULTS:
– Eraserhead: 24 votes
– Mulholland Dr.: 16 votes
– Naked Lunch: 14 votes (probably would have been my vote, definitely didn’t take enough LSD before I saw that)
– Donnie Darko: 14 votes
– The Fountain: 12 votes
– 2001: 9 votes
– Pi: 7 votes
– Altered States: 2 votes (might have been my runner-up)
– Other: (there were a freakin’ TON of write-ins last week, a lot of which I’ve never even heard of, so just gonna list ’em like so)
– Visitor of a Musuem: 1 vote
– Mr. Nobody: 1 vote
– The Village: 1 vote
– Son of the Mask: 1 vote (how that movie ever got released may be the most flat-out weirdest thing about this whole poll)
– Blue Velvet: 1 vote
– Kaboom: 1 vote (yeah, that looked really weird)
– Event Horizon: 1 vote
– Liquid Sky: 1 vote
– Inland Empire: 1 vote (you know what I’m talkin’ about)
– Enter the Void: 1 vote (very weird)
– Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen: 1 vote (well played)
– Primer: 1 vote (oh yeah)
– The Cremaster Cycle: 1 vote
– Zeroes: 1 vote (love it)
Mr. Popper’s Penguins (2011)
Ace Ventura + farting penguins = fun for the whole family!
Yeah, definitely not my thing and I’m sure a whole lot of dads are gonna hate getting dragged to this today, but at least the kids’ll have themselves a time.
Hit the jump for the full review, yo.
http://blog.moviefone.com/2011/06/18/mr-poppers-penguins-review-/
Green Lantern (2011)
Lots to look at and that’s about it.
In a nutshell, it’s worth seeing for Peter Sarsgaard and some cool fight scenes. What a shame, especially since GL is such a badass superhero. Well, there’s always the sequel.
Hit the jump for the full review, yo!
So in honor of Green Lantern being released tomorrow, what better way to celebrate the occasion than to completely ignore how gorgeous Ryan Reynolds is and instead focus entirely on how effing hideous Peter Sarsgaard is as GL’s nemesis, Hector Hammond. Turns out there are a lot of ugly mother effers in the world of comics, all of which deserve their due, so go ahead and click the gross-ass picture below to check out ten of the most memorable freakazoids for you to point and stare at for the next five minutes. Huzzah!
Midnight in Paris (2011)
VERDICT:
9/10 Moveable Feasts
The best kind of tourism any city could ask for.
Wasn’t expecting it in the least, but say hello to my favorite movie of the year so far. Makes me wanna tackle that Woody Allen marathon like you wouldn’t believe. Anyway, really great stuff, see it if you can, and hit the jump for the full review, homies!
http://blog.moviefone.com/2011/06/15/midnight-in-paris-review/
The Tree of Life (2011)
VERDICT:
9/10 Big Bang Theories
Life, the universe, and innocence lost in Texas.
The Tree of Life is about a man who finds himself disillusioned and lost in an existence he has no connection with and a world that he no longer understands. In order to get himself out of this funk and come to terms with the death of his younger brother that still haunts him years after the fact, he cycles all the way back to the creation of the universe and his days growing up with his two brothers in 1950s Waco, TX under his father’s strict rule and his mother’s loving care.
At least I think that’s what its about. All I know for certain is that it’s like 2001 mixed with Norman Rockwell, and that’s A-okay by me.
So after first seeing the trailer for this way back in October and flat-out crapping myself with anticipation over what looked like an experience that would render every movie ever made null and void, this one’s been a long time coming. I kinda did my homework by watching two phenomenal Malick movies in the lead-up to the big day, and while I’m sure that helped on a number of fronts, I don’t think a lifetime’s worth of preparation could have helped me to unravel this in just one sitting. With that being said, I still don’t think I’ve totally “got” it, but after mulling it over for a week and change, here’s what I’ve got:

This movie is epic in ways that will make you feel like a passing blip on the cosmic radar at times and like the singlemost important creation on this or any other planet at others. Like I said, it’s about a lot of different things that are utterly sprawling in scope and don’t seem to have much commonality at first glance, but putting together the pieces and coming to some kind of understanding over everything it lays on the table is what this is all about. And that’s great, that’s what I’ve come to expect from Terrence Malick and that’s one of many reasons why this guy is simply operating on another level. As for the other reasons, I’ll try to keep it brief ’cause this is the part where I start sounding like a broken record.
No one makes movies like this, no one makes movies that look this naturally gorgeous, and to call it “jaw-dropping” is to shortchange it to a fault. For a guy who’s never been one to manipulate natural beauty and has in turn showed us some of the most mind-blowing imagery in the history of film that could make anyone and everyone feel like they’ve never seen a sunset before, this movie and what it stands for is a culmination of everything that Malick’s ever stood for as a director. This seems like a movie that took absolutely forever to make, the only other director I know who does this good a job of dropping the audience into the lives of another family is John Cassavetes, and it’s insane how much ground and time it covers over the span of two hours and change. In short, the star of this movie is Terrence Malick right from square one, that’s the way it’s always been, and it’s really something to see.

It’s just incredible how he captures this simple, American nostalgia that we’ve lost over the years thanks to our ever-increasing reliance on technology that keeps us plugged in, pushes us away from each another, and distances us from the world around us. It’s playing kick the can with your neighborhood friends, is taking a bath with your little brother and making a beard out of bubbles, it’s drinking water from the hose, it’s the million different things that are synonymous with innocence and fade with age. Then you match all these scenes with this unbelievable score by Alexandre Desplat, and it’s tough not to get swept up in the whole thing. Really beautiful, really profound stuff that you takes you back in time and works a way better in motion than it does in text.
But before this love fest gets outta hand, the thing that has me going back and forth about The Tree of Life and almost made me give it a slightly lower Verdict is that, as easy as it is to admire this movie on so many levels that went above and beyond the hype, I wish there had been more of a personal connection for me. The funny thing is that this is about as universal as they come and that personal connection might have hit me like sledgehammer had I grown up with brothers and been born 30 years earlier. But even if that had been the case, since this movie is so much about Malick from top to bottom, it ultimately makes the characters feel secondary to the world around them.
Granted, maybe that’s the whole point, although for such authentic characters from a writer/director who’s given us some of the most realistic characters ever put to celluloid, it’s too bad that I couldn’t feel more empathetic. Not that that’s a gripe against the cast though, because they’re all pretty swell.

Brad Pitt couldn’t have been a more physically fitting match to play a red-blooded, tough-loving, all-American father, and he’s good even though it’s Jessica Chastain who steals the show as the understanding, affectionate mother. And props to first-timer Hunter McCracken (what a name) who does a fine job as young Jack, although Sean Penn doesn’t have a whole lot to do except look sad all the time and dish out some cryptic voiceovers as middle-aged Jack.
Geez, I could go on about The Tree of Life, but I’ll save the dissertation for another day since this is a movie that deserves a discussion rather than a rant. It isn’t an easy movie to “get” and it’d be hard to knock anyone for writing it off as pretentious, but keeping in mind that film makers just don’t get any more intentional and purposeful than Terrence Malick, there’s a whole lot to love and even more to dissect. Don’t go in looking for clear questions, clear answers or a firm grasp on what it’s even about or what’s going on, you’ll just end up disappointed. If you’re fine soaking it all in, drawing your own conclusions, and knowing full well that you’re gonna have to work this one out to make heads or tails out of it, it’s worth the effort.
But whatever you go in with and whatever you come out with, it’s a movie worth seeing and a movie worth praising not only as an unbelievable achievement from a technical standpoint, but as something that succeeds by being entirely different from the expected. And for a medium where predictability sells, it’s so effing great to see movies that march to the beat of their own drum.
And the best comedy of the past decade is…
Sorry for the two-week poll, folks, but I just had to see if Black Dynamite could make a comeback. As for the winner, I know it’s the top-grossing R-rated comedy of all-time, I know how many people love the hell out of it, and I’m not gonna argue that it’s a funny movie. Then again, it’s probably the last movie I would have voted for. I’ve got my reasons, they’re all there in the parentheses, but I’ll leave it up to you crazy kids to get the debate going.
Swell voting all the same. I love you guys.
RESULTS:
– The Hangover: 9 votes
– Anchorman: 6 votes (outrageously quotable)
– Black Dynamite: 5 votes (everything)
– Tropic Thunder: 4 votes (the fake trailers and Tom Cruise)
– Mean Girls: 4 votes (best “chick flick” of the past decade)
– Wedding Crashers: 3 votes (“People helping people…”)
– Superbad: 4 votes (the dream montage where Jonah Hill tries to buy liquor)
– Bad Santa: 4 votes (Thurman Murman)
– The 40-Year-Old Virgin: 3 votes (best running gag of the past decade)
– Shaun of the Dead: 7 votes (the be-all, end-all of horror comedies)
– Office Space: 5 votes (The Jump-To-Conclusions Mat)
– Zoolander: 2 votes (“Your mistake indeed!”)
– Napoleon Dynamite: 2 votes (“How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them mountains?”)
– Borat: 3 votes (the rodeo)
– Team America: World Police: 2 votes (puppet sex)
– Other: 1 vote for Sideways (oh, you wino), 2 votes for Little Miss Sunshine (that dance scene is still freaking brilliant), 1 vote for Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (not quite as funny as Terminator: Salvation), 1 vote for Ali G Indahouse (will take your word for it), 1 vote for In Bruges (I gotta see that again), 1 vote for Cedar Rapids (hell yes), 1 vote for Beavis and Butt-head Do America (double hell yes), 1 vote for Hot Fuzz (awesome), 1 vote for Super Troopers (word), and 1 vote for “Too many options for a credible result” (oh, I beg to differ, good sir).
Super 8 (2011)
VERDICT:
8/10 Neo-Nostalgias
Making Spielberg proud and fans happy.
All you E.T., Close Encounters, Goonies, and Cloverfield fans rejoice, this was didn’t disappoint. So hit the jump to get the full scoop, yo’.
The Fearless Freaks (2005)
VERDICT:
7/10 Soft Bulletins
Proves that there’s more to these guys than just crowd surfing in giant bubbles and a song about putting vaseline on toast.
The Fearless Freaks is a documentary about the alt-rock band The Flaming Lips that chronicles their early beginnings as a family affair from Oklahoma City to their current status nearly 30 years later as minor rock gods who sell out stadiums from sea to shining sea with the craziest shows this side of GWAR.
As of late, there have been two sub-genres that I’ve been itching to take a serious nose-dive into after ignoring them for years and bumping them down on my Netflix queues for God knows how long. The first is Asian revenge movies and the second is rockumentaries. I’ll save the revenge movies rant for another day, but considering how much I love music and love movies, I feel shame whenever I come across a “Best Rockumentaries” list and realize that I have not been doing my homework, that I have not only failed myself as fan, but I have failed my musical heroes. I hope that they can find it within themselves to someday forgive me, because I am not worthy.

With that being said, it’s kinda weird that I skipped Gimme Shelter, The Last Waltz and Stop Making Sense and went right to this instead. For starters, I’m not exactly the biggest fan of The Flaming Lips (not that I dislike them, I just never really gave ’em the time of day that I should have), but I effing love The Stones, The Band and Talking Heads. On top of that, I’m still not really sure how I feel about Lips front man/mastermind, Wayne Coyne. His hair is cool and people generally seem to think he’s the shit, but after he took it upon himself to crap all over Arcade Fire two years ago in a move that can only be categorized as “dick”, my opinion of the guy has been a tad jaded. Can’t really hold it against him since he apologized for it and all, but still not a good foot to start off on.
Then again, I did see this movie turn up every now and again on those “Best Rockumentary” lists, and even if I only knew a handful of their songs going into it, The Flaming Lips are a band that has always been interesting as sin.
See, I don’t know about you guys, but at the sake of sounding like a music snob, I’m of the general mindset that music kinda sucks these days. I know, I know, for every Justin Bieber there’s a Black Keys and that’s the way it’s always been, but whether it’s the fact that Nickelback is still a band or the way hip-hop has devolved to nothing more than clicks and whistles by artists who couldn’t write a song like “Things Done Changed” if Biggie’s ghost came down and started rhyming with them on Christmas Eve like Jacob-fucking-Marley, the standard seems pretty low these days. Even though they totally deserved it, Arcade Fire winning that Album of the Year Grammy was a freakin’ fluke.

Anyway, what separates The Flaming Lips from the pack is that they’ve always marched to the beat of their own drum. They don’t sound like other bands, each new album is something totally different from the one before it, and they actively try to challenge themselves as musicians rather than just go with what’s familiar. That’s why people listen, that’s why I respect them, and that’s why I turned this on. And in that regard, this movie is as interesting as the band. But in other regards, it definitely leaves something to be desired.
I mean, the bummer about their back story as a band is that there ultimately isn’t a whole lot that’s stuck with me outside of the music and that the Lips’ lead guitarist, Steven Drozd, is far and away the most interesting member of the group, especially when it gets to his on-again, off-again heroin addiction (because no rockumentary is complete with a heroin addiction). There’s a ton of home footage and behind-the-scenes stuff that will probably make die-hard fans feel like part of the family, but as a fringe fan, it doesn’t always work. I guess it goes back to my back-and-forth feelings about Coyne, it’s just that I don’t know whether I buy the shtick. It’s watching him walk around the rough neighborhood of his hometown and talking to everyone he passes by like it’s Sesame Street, it’s the revelation that his band pretty much shamelessly copied everything they loved about The Butthole Surfers from their live shows down, and it’s just this nagging feeling that he’s putting on an act.

But then again, I could be totally wrong on that, I just thought he’d come off as more authentic, I guess. Although it is cool to see a front man who’ll proudly admit to being a shitty musician (at least at the start of things) and that the band made up for it by just being loud and putting on a batshit crazy show, stolen or not.
Sorry for turning this into a soap box of sorts for all my frustrations that rise up every time I turn on the radio, but since a big reason The Flaming Lips stand out is due to the way unoriginality is embraced by the masses, this seemed like as good a time as any to vent to all you fine readers. The downside to this doc aside from how I wish it had spent more time on-stage and less on their roots is that I can’t say whether this movie will be even remotely interesting for anyone who’s never heard of The Flaming Lips, actively tries to contract Bieber Fever, or doesn’t have to skip past “She Don’t Use Jelly” every time they put on Pandora (I can’t be the only person that happens to). But as an open-minded introduction to an awfully unique band and a retrospective on why they matter, The Fearless Freaks is worth a go. Definitely makes you want to get familiar with their stuff and, as it turns out, their stuff is pretty damn good, too.












