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The Best Movies of 2013: #86 – #66

January 27, 2014

Hey, everybody! Long time no blog.

Apologies for the sudden four-month absence around these parts. Work’s been hella busier and I’ve been shifting my creative juices to brave new frontiers as of late. More on that later.

Didn’t manage to break triple digits this time and I also missed out on a handful of keepers (eg: Captain Phillips, Short Term 12, Battle of the Year). Nevertheless, 86 is a crap ton of movies and it’s time I gave ’em their due. So without further ado, let’s get this party started.

86. Sharknado
Was really hoping for one of those “so bad it’s good” situations, but hope can be a funny thing.

85. A Good Day to Die Hard (Full Review)
That’ll do, Bruce. That’ll do.

84. The Last Stand (Full Review)
If it hadn’t been by one of my favorite directors these days – the same guy who gave us this and this –  I’m guessing I wouldn’t have been such an utter buzzkill. Seriously though, check those movies if you haven’t already.

83. The Bling Ring (Full Review)
Great opening credits, but all press is good press for the little assholes that inspired this.

82. The Kings of Summer
A crowd favorite that just didn’t do it for me. Tried way too hard for its own good.

81. Admission (Full Review)
White people, right?

80. Jack the Giant Slayer (Full Review)
Big fan of everyone involved here, just not sure why there were involved.

79. Elysium (Full Review)
Not a fan.

78. Grabbers
So much potential, could have been a blast, never managed to capitalize on either fronts.

77. Oblivion (Full Review)
Eye candy can only do so much to save a Frankenscript like this.

76. The Bitter Buddha (Full Review)
Still not sure how I feel about this guy.

75. Epic (Full Review)
Just another Pixar knockoff with Pitbull and Beyonce, which is fine. Little brother dug it and that’s all I was really hoping for.

74. World War Z (Full Review)
Just another zombie movie that could have been so much more.

73. Venus and Serena
Theirs is a story worthy of film and it does make some astute points about how male and female athletes are viewed in the public eye. Still, seems like a random, anticlimactic time to share their story with the world.

72. Prince Avalanche
Felt like I was watching the artsiest locker-r0om conversation ever cut to film. Killer ‘stache on Rudd, though.

71. To the Wonder (Full Review)
Points for appearances and doing something different. Could have used some more focus, though.

70. Future Weather
Never really clicked with me, bummed it didn’t.

69. The Wolf of Wall Street
Don’t get me wrong; it’s incredibly well-made, liked it a lot more than I expected to and it’s one of Leo’s best performances. But the fact remains: fuck Jordan Belfort. People like Belfort shouldn’t be rewarded for doing what they did, especially with an Oscar-nominated movie that paints him as a hero of sorts, a hero that douchebags far and wide will celebrate and idolize like he’s Tony Montana. Could have afforded to lose an hour, too. Alright, stepping off the soapbox…

68. It’s a Disaster (Full Review)
Inspired premise that never really caught its stride until the final scene. Great final scene though.

67. Only God Forgives
Actually kinda dug it until those last 15 minutes. No coming back from that.

66. The Spectacular Now
Pretty misleading title, huh?

Alright, sports fans. See you tomorrow for the next 15.

15 Comments leave one →
  1. January 27, 2014 6:19 am

    I like lists that are completely different than most. Looking forward to the rest.

  2. January 27, 2014 7:23 am

    I like the Spectacular Now and Wolf much more than you do. But otherwise I agree with many of these.

    Especially Elysium. That one is not good.

    • January 27, 2014 7:58 am

      Like I said, there’s a lot to like about Wolf of Wall Street, but on principle alone, there’s even more to dislike. And you’re definitely not alone with The Spectacular Now. Been turning up on a lot of Best Of lists as of late. Felt kinda muddled to me, but hey, to each his own.

      Glad we’re on the same page with Elysium though. Woof.

  3. January 27, 2014 10:12 am

    I’ve been wanting to see your review on Wolf of Wall Street for quite some time, but I guess I see what you’re saying. A lot of others are having a problem with the film too and I think that’s why most of its Oscar-chances are all gone. Nice to see the list, though. Can’t wait for what’s next!

    • January 27, 2014 10:14 am

      I think Leo’s still got a chance, but I’d love to see McConaughey run away with it. Just the kind of biopic that makes me wonder why it was even made, not to say that it isn’t without its merits from a filmmaking standpoint. But hey, that’s just me. What’d you think?

      • January 27, 2014 10:21 am

        I liked it A LOT. However, the more and more I think about it, the more I do think it could have been cut-down by quite a lot. Although, being a huge and dedicated Leo fan, I was happy to not only see him do amazing work, but also stretch himself a bit more. Times are ‘a changin’ for Leo, and it’s an exciting time in my life, once again.

  4. January 27, 2014 8:18 pm

    Reblogged this on Rosevoc2's Blog.

  5. January 28, 2014 3:56 am

    I don’t get it? You said this is the best films of 2013 and proceeded to hate them all?! What’s going on?!

    • January 28, 2014 7:56 am

      Hahaha. You make a good point. All will become clear in the coming days.

  6. January 29, 2014 5:03 pm

    I’m digging this list and looking forward to the last installments. Totally agree with your comments on the “Wolf of Wall Street”. On political principles I’m not seeing it and will wait until I don’t have to spend a penny to take a look but frankly, I found the trailer nauseating enough. Also was intrigued by your comments on “Ain’t in it For My Health”, which I’m seeing later this week. The Band were a particular favorite of mine and from reading Levon Helm’s autobiography, part of his bitterness stems from “The Last Waltz” which he felt prematurely broke up the group so Robbie Robertson could go cinematic ego-tripping with (guess who?) Marty Scorsese. It will be interesting to see if that’s in the film. Glad at least I got to see Levon in the latter-day version of the Band in the early 90s and “Atlantic City” was a highlight of the show. Best, Rick

  7. January 29, 2014 11:44 pm

    Nice to see you back with an epic list! I’m surprised to see The Kings of Summer and The Wolf of Wall Street ranked so low though. You’ve got me curious how the rest of this is going to play out.

    • January 30, 2014 8:23 am

      Haha. Thanks, man! Yeah, Kings of Summer felt way too forced and artsy while WoWS was just a hard one to forgive on principle. Still, glad you hear you dug ’em more than I did. Hope the rest don’t disappoint!


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