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Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie (2012)

May 22, 2012

5/10 Shrim Cocktails

Fire up that crack pipe.

Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie is about two friends named Tim and Eric who are given a billion dollars to make a movie. Why? Who knows. But instead of delivering on their agreement, they end up making a three minute movie called Diamond Jim after spending the rest of their money on life gurus, diamond suits, new teeth – you name it. The producers of Diamond Jim are none too happy about this, so Tim and Eric decide to raise the money they blew by becoming the new owners of a decrepit mall. As they rebuild the mall through their new company Dobis (short for “Doing Business”), they find themselves fending off wolves, falling in love, and struggling to make that billion before their old producers find out where they ran off to.

You don’t need to know much about Tim and Eric to know that these two guys are…off. The trailer explains it all really. They specialize in a strange that only gets stranger, and only on Adult Swim, the birthplace of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, could they make a living and find a fanbase.

But since I am a twenty-something male nerd, it just so happens that I love Adult Swim, love Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and love Tim and Eric. The time I’ve wasted surfing through Tim and Eric clips on YouTube is nothing short of inordinate, but since I nearly choked on my tongue from laughing in the process, I’d say it was time well spent. It’s hard to sum up what it is about these guys that somehow landed them a movie deal, but they sure do have a different sense of humor.

For example, a brief list of Tim and Eric’s “signature” gags:

– Lots of squishing sound effects, regardless of relevance, always amplified to maximum. If it exists, it squishes.

– Casting actors – typically of the elderly/”something’s-not-right-with-that-person” sort – in recurring roles, despite complete lack of acting experience.

– Making weird faces, making them often.

– Intentionally mispronouncing/inventing words.

– Good ol’ diarrhea.

If this doesn’t sound like your kind of humor, then just trust me that it most definitely isn’t. Between Eric getting a Prince Albert and Tim rolling around in a G-string with a dildo on his forehead, things get pretty gross pretty fast and don’t cool down. Some people won’t get it, some people will, but even for Tim and Eric fans, it certainly tests the limits of decency. I mean, this is old hat for Tim and Eric. It’s not like they finally started whipping out the diarrhea jokes once their movie got green-lit. The only real difference now is that they get to curse and can do just about anything with all the dildos they want.


The good thing is that I was prepared for this stuff, and, oddly enough, the shock factor ended up being more of a pro than a con. But for the uninitiated, it’ll be about as much fun as the Ludovico Technique. The truth of the matter is that some things are just better in 30-minute bursts than two-hour stretches. Since the whole damn movie is nonsense, it does lose its appeal after a while, and if you’re not on board from the get-go, there’s not much here that’ll make you want to stay. Unless you have a movie review blog, then you’ll have to stick it out.

Like I said, the humor here is beyond strange, and I am absolutely at a loss as to how Tim and Eric got so many noteworthy actors to join in on the “fun.” Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Will Forte, and Zach Galifianakis are T & E regulars, but I wish Robert Loggia and William Atherton had stayed under their rocks instead of resurfacing for this. It’s just…sad to watch these classic character actors submit themselves to such truly bizarre lengths. It’d be one thing if they got laughs for their efforts, but since that ain’t happening, you just feel bad for them. Poor, poor Robert Loggia and William Atherton. This is no way to make a comeback.


If you asked me a year ago, I’d say that Tim and Eric were the future of comedy. Now, I think they might have shot themselves in the feet.

All the same, I still think they’re hilarious and I laughed at their movie more than I would care to admit. The real problem is that I can think of maybe one or two people that I could actually recommend this to. Burnouts and drunkards are gonna eat this up faster than a Dorit0-shelled taco, but humanity in general won’t be anywhere near as receptive. Not that the quality of any movie should be grounded in how many people will like it, it just becomes an issue when you worry about suggesting it to people who would like it. I wish I had better news to report, but Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie is far too much of a good thing.

Doesn’t mean I’ll stop watching those YouTube clips though.

600th REVIEW, YO!


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